Dear mother

WARNING – will contain strong language suitable for adults only

you fucking bitch – there, I said (wrote) it.

Does it make me feel better? – No.
Do I hate you? – I wish.

So what do I feel about you now? Truth to be known, I don´t know, I try not to think about you too much because otherwise, it would drive me nuts.

Tell me mum, how does it feel to have lost everything and everyone you have ever lived for? Do your internet friends make up for not having a loving family? Oh, sorry, I forgot, you don´t want a family anymore.

Tell me mum, were you really to daft to call for an ambulance when dad had the stroke because, and it pains me to say it, the thought has crossed my mind that you just did not want him to be saved. Sounds harsh, doesn´t it? It brought tears to my eyes when I first thought of this possibility. I mean, lets face it, you were quite capable of approaching Joe Block on the parking lot to get him to google your sons work phone number but you were adamant that you did not want an ambulance.

And when my brother told you that he knew what was going on, what he had known for months and which literally drove him round the bend, you argued. Ok, fair enough I ´d like to think that you were embarrassed but not to go down when you heard the ambulance, when he collapsed that night, some mum you are!!

And when my brother told me what he knew, I pretended to you not to know too much, just asked you to give the internet a rest, so to speak, you were ok with it. Dad was still in hospital and boy did you blossom on the net, despite my pleas for you to stop.

Your internet friends, your internet fuckers I might say, are far more important to you than your family.

Internet, that is the life, everything else is boring. Friends in the real world have been pushed aside, they are boring, your husband of 51 years (yes dear mum, it´s 51 years now, bet you forgot your wedding anniversary recently). Anyway, your husband of 51 years, who has not only survived the stroke but came out of it unharmed, physically and mentally, well he is just old to you, boring like the rest of us.

Your son and daughter, dead in your eyes, you threatened to kill us with a knife and would happily and willingly be jailed for it, should we ever enter your (and dad´s, of course) house again.

Why? because I took dad to your GP when you did your disappearing act for 4 days. Now you feel that you have lost face, had to change the GP. Why is that, mum, because deep down you know that you are a fucking internet whore??

Your grandkids? Now that´s a classic. They are a burden to you, remember that´s what you wrote to one french fucker?? By the way, CALAIN1

mark my words, if I find out that you still have contact with her, I will destroy your family life just like you helped to destroy mine!!

You told your grandson, my eldest, that you would kill me with an axe, in vivid detail you told him. Why I do not know because he refuses to talk about it, it was my brother who told me that your grandson was crying uncontrollable. This is, by the way, the cop we are talking about so he isn´t easily shocked. The grandson you helped to raise, your first grandchild who was always special to you. He could have had you arrested for that, you know? Just like I could have you done for threatening to kill me because I´ve got it on tape, you did not know that, didn´t you? Not that you´d care anyway.

Christmas was a classic, despite my better judgement, I asked my dad to tell you that you were welcome to come, too, like we always do, celebrate christmas together. The thought really scared me, not knowing what to say or how you´d react but you told your sister shortly beforehand that you were sooo lonely, no one cared for you – yeah bollocks!!!

Needless to say you did not turn up and I had to watch my dad cry under the christmas tree, we all did!! Still, I gave him the present for you and … you must have dropped it off at dawn because it was lying on my patio when we put the shutters up – you bitch!!!! I had to explain to the wee ones why you left the your present which was from the kids for you, on the patio. You heartless cow, never mind no one cares for you – you couldn´t give a shit about anyone or anything but your precious fucking computer!!!

Currently you are “getting cleared up” giving your sister washing baskets full of stuff to keep – telling my dad that she wants to borrow it – he knows you know, because the only daft one are you. You are a mental nutcase and I wish I could hate you. It´s your birthday next month and it scares me because part of me still thinks of you as my mum, the one who was always loving, kind and who was a great mum, the best. But you are gone, lost forever and the few times when everything went mad and you went mental, shouting, threatening – I looked into your eyes and I saw madness, madness and hatred.

You are working again, what a joke, you are coming up to 71 mother – I repeat SEVENTY-ONE – not a spring chicken anymore, believe you me. You intimidate my dad, he is so careful with what he says or does so as not to UPSET you because otherwise you will start the mental rage, the shouting again and quote dad

the doctor has told him that any kind of stress could kill him

so he tries to blank it out and leaves the room when you start.

You can´t even be civil when we call and ask to speak to him, you´ve got to runt and rave, tell him it´s a bitch on the phone for hime or mimick my voice when I´d asked to speak to my dad. “Daaaad, someone want´s to speak to her Daaaad”. You stupid cow!!!!!!!

Seems to me that you are just planning your exit, waiting for him to die. You bitch, I so hope it´s you who goes first and it hurts me so much to write this. I can not imagine what it will be like when my dad dies, you will have killed him, you know, you already have blood on your hands because you are making him unhappy and I know that when you die you will burn in hell for your sins!!!

Well, dear mother, rest assured that you will never ever hear your children tell you that we love you, you will never ever be hugged by us, your grandchildren will never call you Omi again, nor will I ever call you Mutti again. You are alone, totally alone in this world and you will die alone, just you and your virtual buddies.

I hope it was worth it.

oh, and by the way, please don´t send anymore of your naked pictures via the net into the world – trust me, you and your fucking bitch of a friend Regina – next time I might even post a link to her phone number – well, you two are past it and seing two old women in discriminating poses and with their tongues hanging out is NOT a nice sight, believe you me.

About crazybunny66

I am your average wife,mother,friend,employee....a bit lost in my world, a bit crazy at times but always good for a laugh - I think ;-)

‹ Winter

Writing Challenge: the Devil is in the Details ›

Tagged with: about me, crazy, family, hurt, internet, life, mother, my life, uncensored
Posted in Uncensored